Merry go round of life

Round and round I go and to be honest I never like the merry go round.  I got dizzy and would think "what's the point of this ride"?  You don't go anywhere, you don't do anything, all you do is sit there and watch the world spin around you with every revolution.  As much I didn't like this ride it seems that I have spent way too much time on it.  Watching the world spin by while all I do is sit there.

So when I came to this realization (and I have many time before this) why haven't done anything about it?  Simple answer and the only answer is I'm lazy.  No other explanation that I can think of and no other excuse.

I'm lazy and I don't want to change.  It really is that simple when I think and reflect back.  It's easier to do nothing and accept life as it comes Vs doing something about it.  Why haven't I reached some of my goals in life?  Because I'm too lazy to follow them all the way through and or make the permanent changes in my life that would allow me to reach these goals.  I know that I can do almost anything I put my mind to and I have proven that when I want to change I can make some amazing things happen.  I have seen some of my teammates change their lives for the better and I applaud them for their courage and effort to change.  I look at myself and I say to my self, "that's good enough" and I accept mediocrity because I'm too lazy to put the sustained effort to affect long term change.

The thing is, I know why I am like I am.  I know that I have let my self accept mediocrity in my life as the norm.  What I need is a swift kick in the back side or slap upside my head to "wake me up".  However I know that the only one to do this is myself.  A lifetime of mediocrity is a tough thing to change unless I want it more than anything else.  So now how bad do I want it?

Ian Repay
Student Of Silent River Kung Fu
Stony Plain,

Tiger Challenge

I spent the entire day at the Kwoon for our annual Tiger Challenge.  This year was special for me as I was the tail for the lion dance. Sifu Langer was the head and he did a great job in his first performance!  What a blast it was and I have to admit that it was a huge highlight for me.

The day went by so quickly right from the lion dance to the pizza and snacks at the end!  I must say that this was a great "mental" day for me.  We focus so much of our effort on the physical aspect of the training and at time we forget how important the mental aspects are.  Sihing Tymchuck and I spent a good portion of the day chatting and competing against each other.  I have tons of respect for that man and consider him a true friend.  He gets it, the mental side and we spent some time discussing the day and how it affected us.

Today for me was one of those days that were truly inspiring.  From the very young children that gave it everything they had to the black belts that were awe inspiring to watch.  To feel the energy in the kwoon from the morning to the afternoon was something that I find intoxicating.  Everyone there was putting themselves out there and most were not in their comfort zone.  However everyone who was there embraced the opportunity and will be better for it.

Mr. Ian Repay
Student Of Silent River Kung Fu

Diet & love of food

I have always had a love of food. Up until recently my career was based in the food industry.  Food to me is one of life's pleasures.  To be enjoyed, savored and relished in with good friends and family.  To me it shouldn't be just fuel for the body.  I'm never going to be that person that is so extremely regimented that I would only eat steamed chicken breast with steamed brown rice and raw broccoli, BLECK!!!  I grew up in a house where my mother and both of my grandmothers were excellent cooks and take out or fast foods was a once a month "treat".

I have found as I get older that I need to take a look at what I'm eating.  I have found that my diet is affecting how I feel both mentally and obviously physically.  I do eat more fast food than I would like to admit and mostly because its convenient and also because I like the taste.  I have found that when I take the time to properly plan my meals and cook myself that I feel better because I'm eating better.  As I'm starting to increase my training at the kwoon, I can see a definite coloration between what I eat and how I feel while I'm training and after I'm done.  I have noticed that when I don't eat well, I can't focus well on what is being taught.  I also find that I lack the appropriate amount of energy that would help me perform at the level that I want to be at.

This morning as I write this, I'm enjoying a cup of black espresso and a bowl of hot cooked grains with milk and a touch of brown sugar.  This is my happy place when it comes to breakfast on a Sunday morning.

Mr. Ian Repay
Student Of Silent River Kung Fu
Stony Plain, Alberta

All about priorities

This is has been a struggle for as long as I can remember.  What is a priority to me?  This kind of comes and goes depending on where I am mentally.  I tend way to often to lower my priorities too much.  I know that I perform the best when I am under immense pressure.  However I think I perform this way because I have left myself no other choice.

When it come to ranking priorities in my life I tend to rank those that have immediate gratification close to the top.  Ones that take too much time to achieve get pushed lower down.  For example, writing my blogs at times seem like a chore and there isn't anything that I can "touch" that will tell me there is gratification for doing this.  It goes back to my current mental state.  Right now, mentally I'm in a good place and I see value in pushing this blog toward the top of my list.  Why is that?  It's because I can "feel" the value of this mentally not only for my self but those of my teammates.  It's kind of hard to explain but this is how I'm currently seeing it.  Secondly, physically I'm getting back to a better place and that helps me mentally.  Yesterday Sifu Lindstom instructed the fitness class and he did a great job pushing me very hard.  I needed it and he didn't let me stop.  I forgot how good it feels when it was all over and your body has that wonderful "tingly" feeling.  I feel mentally better about myself because I'm pushing my body physically to get back to where I want to go.

So all of this is helping me re focus my priorities and I'm pushing my Kung Fu back closer to the top of my priority list.  Now the challenge will be not to let my Kung Fu slide down the priority list, any suggestions?

Mr. Ian Repay
Student Of Silent River Kung Fu

The Journey

We had our monthly I Ho Chuan meeting yesterday and it was great to see everyone again.  Its been almost two months since I have been at the kwoon due to work and its been wearing on me.

We discussed mastery as the path and not so much the destination.  I have always had a difficult time realizing something as abstract as a black belt or building something like a shed or a chicken coup (if you don't believe me come over and see my coup).  I see this very large end goal and I don't see the small ones that mark progress along the way.  I get distracted and disengaged from projects if I can't achieve some level of success along the way. 

With my kung Fu this is exactly the same.  Early on I had lots of success as the knowledge was all new and the belt promotions were closer together.  Now where I am the successes are farther apart and I'm getting distracted and discouraged.  I do look back on where I have been and when I do I become motivated again.  Its just hard to force myself to look behind when I have always looked ahead and to a certain extent been programmed that way. 

I'm working on getting back to enjoying the journey and celebrating the little successes as they come.  I'm now focusing on my next stripe (black) then the next and then my brown belt.  Little by little I'm back on the path and little by little I'm starting to enjoy the journey again.

Mr. Ian Repay
Student of Silent River Kung Fu

A work in progress

I'm sitting in my hotel room in Fort McMurray and not in the kwoon training.  It seems like such a long time ago that I had any consistency in my training.  It seems all that I can do these days is get a couple of days of training at the kwoon before I'm called away by work. It's not the ideal situation but I'm trying to take it in stride as best that I can. 

I'm looking at this as an opportunity to train differently.  I'm training on my own and am getting my form reps in.  I have even started to run (anyone that knows me knows how I hate this!) every couple of days I to try and get some cardio in.  In the past I would have become very frustrated with this and would be in a very low place.  However this time around this isn't bothering me near as much as it used to.  Now I am looking at things differently, I am looking at the opportunity that is in front of me. 

The one thing that I still struggle with is sharing what I'm doing.  I have a hard time with as I'm a very private person.  I always felt that what I do with my life is for me and me only.  I'm now realizing that my failures and or successes affect those around me such as my family and my team mates.  I am starting to realize that by sharing these things with others is making me a better person.  A work in progress.

Can't wait to see everyone!

Mr. Ian Repay
Student of Silent River Kung Fu.
Stony Plain, Alberta

Golf & Kung Fu

I was reading Mr. Sands blog regarding golf a couple of weeks ago.  It was an interesting read and this year I have played more golf than I have ever played in the last couple of years.  However this past Friday was the first time that I realized the connection between the two.

First off to be really good at either you need to practice and or train a lot and more importantly consistently.  Secondly both require a large amount of mental training/discipline.  Many times have I said "nine holes aren't enough and 18 is too many.  They need to make a 13 hole course".  The reason that I have said this is not that I'm tired physically but it's the mental side of the game that is hard to maintain through 18 holes of golf.

Finally the last and the most important similarity would have to be the six harmonies.  Shoulders & hips, elbows & knees & hands and feet all are important in both golf and Kung Fu.  I played with a guy that was the same size and make up as me but he could consistently hit the ball far and straighter than me.  What I noticed was how effortlessly he hit the ball.  Some guys use all shoulders and arms when they hit the ball and it's very easy to see.  The guys that can hit the ball far and straight with out too much effort are the ones that are employing the "six harmonies" and most of them don't even know it.

This past Friday was one of those moments when you realize what you are learning in the Kwoon is applicable in other areas of life.  When I slowed my swing down and really focused on the six harmonies the ball traveled farther and straighter and there was much much less touqure in my upper body.  I really noticed that when my hips where moving in harmony with my shoulders that I really felt a nice swing.  It's moments like this, that's gets me more and more excited to keep coming back to the Kwoon!

Ian Repay
Student of Silent River Kung Fu
Stony Plain, Alberta, Canada.