Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Tiger Challenge - reflection



First off what a great event!  The quality of the event would not have been there but for the efforts of Master Brinker, Sifu Wonziak for all of her work organizing the event and all of the other Sifu's for judging the competitors.  The I Ho Chuan team must be commended for all of thier efforts as well with the organizing of the event as well as the set up and tear down.  With out all of these great people this tournament would not have been the success that it was and will continue to be in the future. 

Here I am right now contemplating how the tournament went for me personally and what I really got of it.  The tourney was a success in that I competed and won the adult grand champion trophy.  Having a goal of winning helped me focus my time and attention on improving my forms both hand and weapon.  I must admit that this was a personal goal of mine as soon as I heard that there was going to be a tournament this year.  I feel that I competed well and I did about as best as I could have expected.  Of the five events that I entered I came away with four gold medals and a 6th place.  I am a little disappointed that I froze up during Lau Gar but this just tells me I need better focus and to work on clearing my mind and letting the form flow like I know it can. 
 
However I can’t shake this  feeling that I have been having since I won the trophy.

I think it comes down to one moment in the tournament when I was point sparing.  It was against a girl that is significantly younger and smaller than me.  I won the match but I didn’t feel good about it and it has been bothering me ever since.  When we squared off against each other I went into my competitive mode.  I competed the way I was taught and the way I have been training.  I came out fast as the objective in point sparring is to score the first strike to earn the point then reset and go again.  The competitor who gets to 5 points wins and moves on.  After the match I took stock of what just happened.  I won and this young girl was (looked to me) devastated.  I can imagine how I must have looked like coming at her.  I am much older, much bigger and much stronger.  I must have looked extremely intimidating to her.  Should I have allowed the match to drag out and allow her to score some points?  In retrospect that is something I think I would do in the future, but at the time all I could think about was winning the match and moving on.  After all this was a tournament not regular class right?  Let me be clear on the fact that I didn’t hit her hard when I did make contact and I was especially careful with my strikes in that I was in control.  However when a punch comes at your face and it gets pulled at the last minute, it can be scary regardless if it doesn’t make contact.

I did go and discuss how I felt with the young girl’s mother who assured me that everything was OK and that her daughter was fine.  She said that they discussed that this was a tournament and this was may happen.  I did feel a little better but still it bothered me.  I made a point of talking to the young girl about an hour after and asked her if she was OK?  She was, she smiled and said everything was good and appreciated me asking. 

Upon a significant amount of reflection over the past couple of days since the tournament I have come to realize that winning should not have been my ultimate goal.  It should have been a by product of the experience.  I look back and realize that the tournament was an opportunity to grow as a martial artists in more ways than just winning.  It was an opportunity to build self confidence in my abilities by being able to perform in front of my peers and our Sifu's.  It was an opportunity to grow together with my fellow competitors that were experiencing the same fears and the same anxiety that I was feeling.

One of the most rewarding things in my life is to being able to call my self a martial artist.  I continue on the path to becoming and growing into the best martial artist that I can be.  Opportunities like the tiger challenge are stepping stones on that path.  What I have learned upon reflection will help me become that martial artist that I so desire to become.

Ian Repay
Student of Silent River Kung Fu
Stony Plain, Alberta

4 comments:

  1. If you were from ego, you would have won at all costs and wouldn't have given a rat's arse. Since you were come from your Spirit, you cared, expressed concern, and did something about it. Plus you learned from your experience and that is the biggest victory of all.

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    1. Thanks for your insights and comments. Your right, if winning was all that mattered then it would not have bothered me like it has. I feel a transformation of sorts taking hold within me. The more I train, the more I learn, the more I surround my self with the great people we have at the kwoon the better martial artist I feel that I am becoming. What a great group of people we have at the kwoon!

      Thank you very much!

      Mr.Repay

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  2. Thats a tough one, emapathy is key. You did the right thing to have a chat with her later. The flipside is that letting someone win or have a false sense of their abilities doesnt work either. I would say, controlling the match in a safe manner and improving upon your awareness is the right approach.That approach, while the opponent is still outmatched, they feel they can walk away learning something from you. I agree with your thoughts, this is how you grow as a martial artist.
    good post!

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  3. When I was three my father started teaching me how to play chess. I didn't win a single game against him until I was thirteen years old. When you compete against another person always give them the respect of you best otherwise it is a wast of your time and theirs. To this day I still love to play chess and partake in the game every chance I get.

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